So last thursday I went out with my home girl/ coworker... when I stumbled across this beautiful Argentinean soccer player. ugh to die for! I guess its safe to say that we were liking each others company that night. we danced all night to like everything, salsa, meringue etc. and he totally commanded my moves. He told me where and how to move with his body and I did just that. As much as I could, was kinda hard keeping up. But for as "aggressive" as he was he really wasn't like "aggressive". So at one point I'm sitting behind him and he's standing in front of me with his back faced me. and he takes my hands and wraps them around his waist. and held them there. I would not have expected that at all seeing how he wasn't forcing himself on me. and ya know what? I truly forgot how much I love to hold people. It's like holding that teddy bear when you are a child cuz you knew that teddy bear loved you like no one else. didn't matter that he/she wasn't real. it was to you!
So I mean if you see my arms, they're not anything short of scrawny. But I gotta say I love to wrap my arms around people and hold them. It almost makes me feel like I'm shielding you? I don't know. It's just, it makes me feel like I'm strong. It probably links into a whole trust thing with me. I love to give good hugs or put my arms around someone because it's a deeper meaning than words. It's like my way of saying you can trust me. I will hold you when you feel weak. I'm always here for you, kinda thing. I love when people can feel like they can trust me and drop their guard with me. Because I'm such a loyal person and sincere, I don't want to disrespect you in anyway and I don't want to deal with disrespect. So if a person can feel that through the warmth of my scrawny arms, well then my arms don't seem so scrawny then. It's been such a long time since I've held someone in my arms and really held them close to me. I forgot what it felt like. and being there with him really reminded me. I'll do it to my coworker once in a very blue moon but I never really go all out cuz like I don't wanna be that creeper! and for as hard as I am, I love to be wrapped up in a moment. I've had a few of those moments in my life and I can tell you that I remember them, most of them. It's just like an awesome feeling. and a feeling you don't just share with anyone. only loved ones ya know.
I get so distracted in life with dumb small shit that I forget that a hug matters. and not just that ass out hug but the ones where they just scream "I'm here with you, in this moment, here I am" and it feels awesome. I don't get those moments anymore. But I'm more than willing to share one. It seems so desperate of a statement. But those moments rock. and I love to have someone feel safe around me. It's just soothing! alright alright, whatevs!
I'm done now!
Breathe me- Sia
More than a Band- Lemonade Mouth
eLLe*
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