Like I seriously need a cleansing. In need to rinse my soul out with some shit. I just need a reup. I mean I can't be miss social butterfly all the time. I want to sit in my room with a being and be quiet. No talking just being. And if I happen to find myself under your arm. Don't hold me with your arms just pull me with your spirit. Reassure me gain my trust with your aura. Don't be too eager. Just fall into it. Sometimes it the absence of words that draw us closer. Making you kindred souls on a journey of enlightenment. And yet somehow I think I'm on a playing field all by myself. In this case beggers should be choosers. I can't take sacred moments like this from anybody. So this may mean that I give out more hugs at work than normal. But I can't have just anyone. Which makes it dangerous. It's a powerfully intense moment sometimes. So I wind up walking away. Shutting it off. Maybe I should stop turning it off. But really I'm not for everyone. Not everyone can handle it. It reminds me of "tattoos". I didn't know anyone could kiss with such intensity. You only see that in movies and there I was in that movie lost in a moment, a drunk moment of passion. Where everyone could see and I could only see her and truthfully sometimes I couldn't even see her. I was just there and happy to be there. At one point we just our foreheads together and I just got weaker. She's a damn phantom. That shit was unreal unlike anything I've felt before. Not from a kiss. But enlightening. I want that all over again. But like I said i don't want that from anyone. Some energies are tainted and they leave filth in yours and that's not always easy to remove. I need a serious detox.
My body wanted soo bad to cuddle with my coworker. I needed that attention. Swerve! I dodged it. Ended up saying no. It's been so long sooooo long but um the warning signs had to be honored cuz it would get strange. Our auras are both too dangerous for words. She reminds me of myself back in the day. And I can still be like that, which is why I don't drink too often because the fangs want to come out and the black widow wants to strike. She's like that too. So let's not and never say we did. It's too easy. And when it's too easy... It's not for me. I can be very strict with myself. Maybe now is the time to not be. At the moment I can't bring myself to do that. I'm very susceptible to bullshit. And I'd really rather not.
That whole rant for no reason I just want to be around good vibrations and rid myself of lingering tastes in my mouth. I'm not going to that party. It's not where I need to be. Carry on.
*elyse
Current sing(s):
hayling- FC kahuna
Butterfly- bass nectar
Sail- awolnation
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