In a Perfect World

      In a perfect world, you'll call to say you're in the area and you'd like to see me.

In a perfect world, we'd sit in my back yard around dusk, laughing, you'd sip a corona and I, a woodchuck sharing a cigar like two G's. I'd have you in staples like I did when we first started, you know the time I told you about how Peach hit the deck when the birds flew over her head. she was mortified... At some point my mom would come out and show you her illegal gun show (her arms) and then tell you "all this is yo playground baby" and you'd cry of laughter. The night would carry on... until it didn't.

And in a Perfect world, I would be able to allow myself to sit there with you without somehow feeling like just another average girl.

      In a perfect world, your heart stopped, like mine did, when you saw me memorial weekend. I meant more than that girl you call a girlfriend. and you'd hope that time could slow up so those brief moments didn't end. Like sparring in the streets... How did we end it that night anyway, did you look after me and think damn I love her, there goes that laugh again, cuz in a perfect world... you did. In a Perfect world, you were proud of me when I told you I'm doing insanity and thought "she's unstoppable, I wish I could be on this journey with her". In a Perfect world, we connected telepathically. I'd send myself and you'd feel me there. and I'd say " I know" without you having to even say it... we were good like that. Cuz in a perfect world you would meet me in our secret place. Imaginary.

      In a perfect world, you'd read this because you knew this day you should. We'd stop running from each other and walk together. Pride would only be recognized as an event for the gays. In a perfect world you would have felt everything that I went through. You'd see the downward spiral I got entangled in after seeing you. In a perfect world, we'd sit down and I wouldn't be so terrified to hear those dreadful words that negate everything we've been through "I love you, but I'm not IN love with you"

But this isn't a perfect World... It's the real world... and in the Real World...

 ... In the real world... it just is what it is. (I hate that saying)

*eLLe

Current song(s):

Butterfly- Bassnecter feat Mimi Page

The Ghost of you- My Chemical Romance

Arms of Sorrow- Killswitch Engage
The End of Heartache- Killswitch Engage